Hi All,
Exhausted from the party that made the Niwot Ranch feel like a Tokyo subway at rush hour and a late night performance of the Blee Blues Experience, Steve, Terry, Sancho, and Web took Suzi's ashes to their final resting spot in Buckingham Park this afternoon.
View Larger Map
View Larger Map
It was warm and partly overcast in the foothills as it will when its snowing on the other side of the continental divide and the moist air descends to Boulder. We took along a nice little evergreen tree that Michelle Wheat had brought as the first of our "Chrissy Decos". Deciding to plant Suzi's ashes and the tree in a less traffic-ed spot, we made a fairly comical scramble across a low rock dam in the creek (about 30 feet wide). Nobody survived with completely dry shoes. Terry took the first of three near headers into the partially ice covered Lefthand Creek almost losing our tree to the current. Quick action by Steve-o aka Blee-Boy saved the plan. We found a small clearing just a few feet from the stream covered in tall but dried grass and, as Terry said, "put Suzi to her final task" of growing the tree tall and strong next to this babbling creek. Due to the hijinks only one ornament remained on the tree - an angel sitting on a sled bearing a gift - to remind us of the gift that she has been to us.
After more keystone cops on the way back over the dam, we took Steve on a short tour of our more "interesting" mountain towns, Ward, in the area with a stop at the Millsite Inn for a pitcher of local microbrew beer and lunch. Then all returned home for a well deserved nap. Enjoy your nap too, Sooz.
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Memorial Service Details
Dearest Loved Ones,
Suzi's body is currently lying in state in the main shrine room on the third floor of the Shambhala Center. Anyone who wishes to visit and sit with her remains in contemplation of the love and spirit you shared with her is welcome to visit the shrine room between now and the service. Please observe the visitation protocol posted in the sitting room just before you enter the main shrine.
We will celebrate Suzi's life and further journey this Friday evening, December 12th. The Memorial Service will be held at the Shambhala Center on the corner of 14th and Spruce in downtown Boulder. The temple will be available for quiet contemplation from 5:30pm and the service will begin at 6pm. Please arrive as close to 5:30 as possible to allow for a quick orientation on the temple and the service to allow you to enter the shrine room with clarity and in contemplation.
Suzi was adamant that these days be a celebration and that black attire would not be in that spirit. Please wear white attire in recognition of the shining light she is.
Immediately after the service, all are invited to the Niwot "Ranch" for further celebration of the life of a great woman who graced us with her presence. As you know she demands that we have a great party. Behavior that might be too spirited for the temple is required for the party. If you are concerned about driving home bring a sleeping bag and we'll have a slumber party.
Address: 8088 Meadowdale Sq
Niwot, CO 80503
We are anticipating that you will be hungry. Food will be served and we request you bring along your favorite beverage.
Suzi has requested that in lieu of flowers donations be made in her name to one of the following organizations:
Boulder Community Hospital - Center for Integrative Care - Suzi received Reiki and massage treatments there as a part of her journey. Click here for details on making your donation.
Mipham Shedra Buddhist Educational Institute - Suzi deeply comforted by visits from Lhoppon Rechung who is her guide through this transition. Click here for details on making your donation.
Yours in the celebration of the passing of a great spirit,
Suzi's Boys
Suzi's body is currently lying in state in the main shrine room on the third floor of the Shambhala Center. Anyone who wishes to visit and sit with her remains in contemplation of the love and spirit you shared with her is welcome to visit the shrine room between now and the service. Please observe the visitation protocol posted in the sitting room just before you enter the main shrine.
We will celebrate Suzi's life and further journey this Friday evening, December 12th. The Memorial Service will be held at the Shambhala Center on the corner of 14th and Spruce in downtown Boulder. The temple will be available for quiet contemplation from 5:30pm and the service will begin at 6pm. Please arrive as close to 5:30 as possible to allow for a quick orientation on the temple and the service to allow you to enter the shrine room with clarity and in contemplation.
Suzi was adamant that these days be a celebration and that black attire would not be in that spirit. Please wear white attire in recognition of the shining light she is.
Immediately after the service, all are invited to the Niwot "Ranch" for further celebration of the life of a great woman who graced us with her presence. As you know she demands that we have a great party. Behavior that might be too spirited for the temple is required for the party. If you are concerned about driving home bring a sleeping bag and we'll have a slumber party.
Address: 8088 Meadowdale Sq
Niwot, CO 80503
We are anticipating that you will be hungry. Food will be served and we request you bring along your favorite beverage.
Suzi has requested that in lieu of flowers donations be made in her name to one of the following organizations:
Boulder Community Hospital - Center for Integrative Care - Suzi received Reiki and massage treatments there as a part of her journey. Click here for details on making your donation.
Mipham Shedra Buddhist Educational Institute - Suzi deeply comforted by visits from Lhoppon Rechung who is her guide through this transition. Click here for details on making your donation.
Yours in the celebration of the passing of a great spirit,
Suzi's Boys
Monday, December 8, 2008
Blast Off !
A champagne toast to a beautiful life of ourWife, Mother and Friend
Tonight at 6:10pm MST Suzi took her last breath. She was surrounded by all of her family, her son Steve held her hand, her grandson Nealon was crawling all over her (she was giggling and smiling at this), husband Terry holding and massaging her feet, stepdaughter Reagan was holding her other hand and giving her a little water and stepson Web (we call him Chief Angel) was running his fingers through her hair. One of her two "night nurses" Helen Kearney (her dearest friend Lilie St. Germaine is Chief Night Nurse), had just read the last chapter of "Who Dies" by Steven Levine, and was also nearby. Justin and Judi Dituri both arrived close to death and fell into meditation. We all feel so blessed to be able to surround her and help her to pass with peace.
Thea Litsos was by to visit just earlier before her passing, delivering a beautiful email from Kathleen (one of her business partners from Washington state) about a perfect moment she had last night with Suzi in her heart and a beautiful sunset over the water.
Last night Suzi spoke to her family in Australia, her granddaughter Charlotte, her daughter-in-law Jenny and Steve's partner Mary. We also regularly read all of your emails and cards to her, which always made her smile.
Suzi's granddaughter CharlotteSuzi had a Buddhist Lama shepherding her passage for the last few weeks. As timing had it, he was scheduled to come at 7pm. Immediately when he arrived, he began the rites of passage.
And so, we all came downstairs and toasted this beautiful woman. The memory that will last in our hearts demonstrates her ability to make anything funny... we made some joke about how heavy the baby was on her belly, and Web said "I'll show you heavy, I'll jump on your belly" and though she had hardly any movement left she made a sweet Suzi smirk that we will always remember.
An enormous thank you to the whole community who reads her blog, scheduled her visits, flowers from around the world, the fundraisers, the food, the calls, friends who showed up to shower her with attention and love... to rub her belly, her feet, her hands... to read to her... we know she left this planet knowing she was deeply loved.
Most of us won't be surprised that Suzi wants us to celebrate the wonderful life she shared with us. Let's remember the sound of her laugh, her sparkling eyes, her joyful spirit. So, raise your glass and here's to Suzi!
Details regarding the memorial will follow.
Suzi's late son SeanThursday, December 4, 2008
New Pics from Holiday Festivities
Contribution and Abundance: Dictated by Suzi
What I have discovered is that contribution and abundance comes from being a part of community. Without community all there is is individual ego fighting one another and fighting itself - struggling. Particularly in the past 9 months, I have found that people want to contribute to us and make a difference but don't know how. There is abundance everywhere. People want to give; flowers and food and love and everything that is coming into this house is abundance through the community being celebrated in this house. My son is here from Perth for three weeks. People just want to give and the letting go is surrendering to that. It's not difficult. It natural in humans to give but somewhere along the line it got distorted and turned into competition and anger. So, my legacy is that I set an example for what is possible for human beings. This isn't just about me. It's about a global conversation. People have been brought together from all over the world through my illness. My son has met his family. He's found a new brother and sister and father.
I want to acknowledge all the friendships that I've made these past four years, and say that I haven't been present to all the love that was there until I opened the door. And now it's just flooding in. These pictures of our parties don't begin to express the extent of the deluge.
As my life is winding down, I'm getting weaker and weaker, but my spirit is still strong. And, I have three wonderful men to support me - Terry, Web and Steve. And, all my angels, too. The come in everyday and do what everyone needs to be done - massages, bathing and having me be comfortable so the transition is peaceful. I have a blessed life.
I love to hear from you and read your comments. This is affecting your lives and your families. Are you going to carry this forward? Let me know how.
Until next week lots of love from all of us to all of you,
Suuz
__________________________________________
Hi all. Techie team again. Suzi is not coming downstairs to the computer these days so I'll post some photos of our recent visits of her cousin Liz and son Steve as well as some of the hijinx going on around here in our celebrations of the Thanksgiving holidays and Suzi's life. You should all be certain that Suzi feels so lucky to be the center of all your thoughts and attention. She said that the last few days have been "perfect". She's blessed by us all as we have been by her and we have been blessed by your support in giving her such a graceful transition.
Thank you.
What I have discovered is that contribution and abundance comes from being a part of community. Without community all there is is individual ego fighting one another and fighting itself - struggling. Particularly in the past 9 months, I have found that people want to contribute to us and make a difference but don't know how. There is abundance everywhere. People want to give; flowers and food and love and everything that is coming into this house is abundance through the community being celebrated in this house. My son is here from Perth for three weeks. People just want to give and the letting go is surrendering to that. It's not difficult. It natural in humans to give but somewhere along the line it got distorted and turned into competition and anger. So, my legacy is that I set an example for what is possible for human beings. This isn't just about me. It's about a global conversation. People have been brought together from all over the world through my illness. My son has met his family. He's found a new brother and sister and father.
I want to acknowledge all the friendships that I've made these past four years, and say that I haven't been present to all the love that was there until I opened the door. And now it's just flooding in. These pictures of our parties don't begin to express the extent of the deluge.
As my life is winding down, I'm getting weaker and weaker, but my spirit is still strong. And, I have three wonderful men to support me - Terry, Web and Steve. And, all my angels, too. The come in everyday and do what everyone needs to be done - massages, bathing and having me be comfortable so the transition is peaceful. I have a blessed life.
I love to hear from you and read your comments. This is affecting your lives and your families. Are you going to carry this forward? Let me know how.
Until next week lots of love from all of us to all of you,
Suuz
__________________________________________
Hi all. Techie team again. Suzi is not coming downstairs to the computer these days so I'll post some photos of our recent visits of her cousin Liz and son Steve as well as some of the hijinx going on around here in our celebrations of the Thanksgiving holidays and Suzi's life. You should all be certain that Suzi feels so lucky to be the center of all your thoughts and attention. She said that the last few days have been "perfect". She's blessed by us all as we have been by her and we have been blessed by your support in giving her such a graceful transition.
Thank you.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Another stage in My Journey...
Last week I wrote that I was going into hospital for another Avastin treatment. Well I did go into hospital but not for Avastin. My cancer has not been responding to treatment, I have a tumour partially blocking my bowel or intestine (as well as other parts)and it has now come to whats known as palliative care.
This was all definitely not on my schedule - but here it is and now I get to be with all of this.
It is my intention that the time I have, however long it is, is a time of joy and celebration for all. I am blessed with so many people in my life since coming here 4 years ago and present to how much difference I have made. But its not about me - all that I can bring is my authentic self and leave you with a legacy that I know you will carry forward. The world is in change and we can all do our bit - the world is abundant and once ego gets out of the way there is an abundant life for all. This I do know. I struggled through life as a child and someway as an adult as well - and I want to see an end to suffering for all.
So let me share with you what is happening - the house is full of flowers and light, we started to decorate for Christmas yesterday (skip Thanksgiving and straight into the Chrissy decos (as we say in Aus!) The house looks great there is still some to go.
My Angels and I decided to bring Christmas forward so they got to play with decorations, grandbabies, dogs and being 5 years old. There was lunch and music and joy! A glorious day! The house looks great - and there is still a little bit more to go to complete it. (Photos will come)
My son Steve is coming from Aus for a coupla weeks on Monday - I am so thrilled to see him and my cousin Elizabeth is coming from London on Friday. I am so moved and thrilled that they are coming. Already I am planning what we will eat - takes my mind of the clear broths that is my staple diet now.
So what is happening with me health wise? My mind is as fertile as ever, though I do get tired. My body is very weak and I can notice signs of it shutting down - I have meditation practices which help me breathe more easily.I have a Hospice Nurse come in a couple of weeks who does the BP etc, tells me about the different drugs to help with pain but most importantly gives me lots of loving as only nurses can.
This week I am starting Buddhist practices with a Buddhist Lama who is well read and studied in the process of death and dying. There is great comfort in being prepared for death, so there is no fear but embracing and welcoming it as the next life. We only fear that which we dont know about.
And now today, it looks like its the first day of Winter (its been late this year for us in Colorado). It looks beautiful outside, and misty with at real English Moor look!
And now thats it for this week - if you would like to come around the weekend of Thanksgiving there will be food (as well as chicken broth!)bring something if you would like to - but PLEASE email Maureen (Social Secretary)on suzi.granger@gmail.com or call Web (Chief Event Planner) on 303 447 4718
See you soon
and lots of love
Suuz xoxoxoxo
This was all definitely not on my schedule - but here it is and now I get to be with all of this.
It is my intention that the time I have, however long it is, is a time of joy and celebration for all. I am blessed with so many people in my life since coming here 4 years ago and present to how much difference I have made. But its not about me - all that I can bring is my authentic self and leave you with a legacy that I know you will carry forward. The world is in change and we can all do our bit - the world is abundant and once ego gets out of the way there is an abundant life for all. This I do know. I struggled through life as a child and someway as an adult as well - and I want to see an end to suffering for all.
So let me share with you what is happening - the house is full of flowers and light, we started to decorate for Christmas yesterday (skip Thanksgiving and straight into the Chrissy decos (as we say in Aus!) The house looks great there is still some to go.
My Angels and I decided to bring Christmas forward so they got to play with decorations, grandbabies, dogs and being 5 years old. There was lunch and music and joy! A glorious day! The house looks great - and there is still a little bit more to go to complete it. (Photos will come)
My son Steve is coming from Aus for a coupla weeks on Monday - I am so thrilled to see him and my cousin Elizabeth is coming from London on Friday. I am so moved and thrilled that they are coming. Already I am planning what we will eat - takes my mind of the clear broths that is my staple diet now.
So what is happening with me health wise? My mind is as fertile as ever, though I do get tired. My body is very weak and I can notice signs of it shutting down - I have meditation practices which help me breathe more easily.I have a Hospice Nurse come in a couple of weeks who does the BP etc, tells me about the different drugs to help with pain but most importantly gives me lots of loving as only nurses can.
This week I am starting Buddhist practices with a Buddhist Lama who is well read and studied in the process of death and dying. There is great comfort in being prepared for death, so there is no fear but embracing and welcoming it as the next life. We only fear that which we dont know about.
And now today, it looks like its the first day of Winter (its been late this year for us in Colorado). It looks beautiful outside, and misty with at real English Moor look!
And now thats it for this week - if you would like to come around the weekend of Thanksgiving there will be food (as well as chicken broth!)bring something if you would like to - but PLEASE email Maureen (Social Secretary)on suzi.granger@gmail.com or call Web (Chief Event Planner) on 303 447 4718
See you soon
and lots of love
Suuz xoxoxoxo
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Pics from the Violette fund raiser and notes on seeing the Sooz!
Hi All,
Suzi's Techie Crew here. . . She asked that we post the pics below from her Violette Boutique fund raiser for your enjoyment! As she said before it was a huge success and she is awed by the generosity of her Lilly and her family, her Angels who put it all together, and her community who showed such support. Take a look!
Also, don't hesitate to check out the calendar (even farther) below and email us with a time you'd like to visit. This calendar and process is becoming more important as you are all reaching out to Suzie with such wonderful love, affection and contribution. She loves to see you all as much as she can, but also needs lots of rest. So get yourself on the schedule!
For nourishing her body, feel free to bring a nice clear broth or juice. For nourishing her soul anything beautiful will do - a relaxing scent, a healing touch, a beautiful thought, a reading of a poem, story, or her book, a beautiful addition to her space (we've decided to start Chrissy decorations early!), a comforting presence as she rests, a helpful hand around the house, or a simple dish, snack or salad for her guests.
Finally, mark your calendars for an open house on the Sunday of Thanksgiving weekend. One of Suzi's greatest wishes is to host her community for a "noice" lunch here in "Noiwot" with the guest of honor ... her son Steve from Australia! Details will follow.
All Our Love and Thanks,
The Team.
Click the photos to see the whole album.
Thanks to Linda Commito for the Pics. Visit her at http://www.communicatewithcards.com
Suzi's Techie Crew here. . . She asked that we post the pics below from her Violette Boutique fund raiser for your enjoyment! As she said before it was a huge success and she is awed by the generosity of her Lilly and her family, her Angels who put it all together, and her community who showed such support. Take a look!
Also, don't hesitate to check out the calendar (even farther) below and email us with a time you'd like to visit. This calendar and process is becoming more important as you are all reaching out to Suzie with such wonderful love, affection and contribution. She loves to see you all as much as she can, but also needs lots of rest. So get yourself on the schedule!
For nourishing her body, feel free to bring a nice clear broth or juice. For nourishing her soul anything beautiful will do - a relaxing scent, a healing touch, a beautiful thought, a reading of a poem, story, or her book, a beautiful addition to her space (we've decided to start Chrissy decorations early!), a comforting presence as she rests, a helpful hand around the house, or a simple dish, snack or salad for her guests.
Finally, mark your calendars for an open house on the Sunday of Thanksgiving weekend. One of Suzi's greatest wishes is to host her community for a "noice" lunch here in "Noiwot" with the guest of honor ... her son Steve from Australia! Details will follow.
All Our Love and Thanks,
The Team.
Click the photos to see the whole album.
Thanks to Linda Commito for the Pics. Visit her at http://www.communicatewithcards.com
Sunday, November 9, 2008
A New Fashion Accessory
This last 2 weeks I have added a new fashion accesory to my wardrobe - an oxygen cylinder. Yep, I have a big tank at home and a portable one I carry around when I go out. I was hoping for a Prada design, leopard skin for the winter - but unfortunately its a jolly old standard plastic one that weighs a ton - and let me tell you I need all the oxygen I can get to haul it around!
So thats what's happening in the health department since last time.
The doc seems to be pleased with the Avastin treatment and I decipher that to mean that the tumours are being held at bay - well they're certainly eating a lot of my body fat and I am quite skinny. My diet changes regularly and I notice there are foods that I can no longer eat.
I am now just taking small amounts of food often and no heavy bulky food as I have trouble digesting that. So its pretty much a diet of nourishing soups, ice cream, fruit, and light meals. No grills or any of the great food that I so love.
So the goal is to build up my body - my lifeforce is strong and its now about getting some nourishment into my body. This sure is a day by day process and I'm finding that the key to it all is to just be with whats so -not getting into any drama (but I do, natch!) but just taking each day as it comes.
I am very grateful for all the wonderful people around me - this is very new for me to allow people to contribute and allow myself to receive! Whats happening is that really beautiful friendships are developing with people who I previously hadnt really known - they are just coming to me.
It makes me think that all we want as human beings is to be connected and related and contribute to others - yet somehow this all goes whoppy and we forget and just be ego driven individuals out to satisfy our own needs and wants. Ekhart Tolle writes about this in A New Earth - it is quite a remarkable book - I recommend it.
So this week, 3 of my Angels, Web, Chad & Maureen have organised a diary (calendar) on the blog (see below) - so you can schedule in when you would like to come visit.
It's real important for me to have contact with people - and I dont get out on the Niwot bus anymore so I love you to come visit me. We can do some cool things - like going to the movies would be one thing I'd love to do, or sitting in Brasserie 1010 having a mineral water with you - that kinda thing would be great. Or a manicure or pedicure - that could be very healing! Whatever, I think its time that I get out more!
Sunday afternoon & evening my friends Lilie & Lisa opened their fashion boutique Violettes for a fundraiser to help support me with my medical expenses. What a wonderful evening - girls just love to socialise and shop and there was quite a buzz as we all tried on new and hip fashion.
If you havent been to Violettes on East Pearl in Boulder - then toddle along - you'll be pleasantly surprised!
And earlier in the month Carrie opened her house for a Silpada jewellery party in my benefit - and again lots of socialising and fun as we shopped. The presenter generously donated her commission - thank you Sparrow.
And thank all of you who came to both events and so generously contributed to my "fund"your love and generosity is helping me get through this time.
Not much else this week - I am having another Avastin treatment Friday - and we'll see how things are after that! I've attached photos of me and my new equipment and also one with the
newest grandbaby - Nealon.
Lots of love to you all
and I look forwad to seeing you real soon
Suuz xoxoxo
Saturday, October 25, 2008
A detour on the journey....
Well, this sure is a journey where the unexpected happens!
This week I've been in hospital quite unexpected! I had a blood clot on my right lung and breathing was darn right difficult and painful. I have been having breathlessness, but this was breathlessness dizzy feelings, weakness and near collapse!
I was going for my weekly massage at the Centre for Integrative Care at the Cancer Centre and told the practitioner what was going on - out came the stethoscope to my lungs and she said "I think you got a clot on your lungs,dear, and I'm going to send you upstairs to the Nurse and then to the doctor.
So by 4.00 p.m Monday I was in hospital, the scans indeed showed up a clot and I have been having intravenous blood thinners and been under observation since then. Apparently this is all a side effect of the treatment I am having and and is now something I am living with!
For someone who has never been sick, this is all a totally new experience - I've rarely taken medication and now I am being pumped up with blood thinners, pain killers and blood pressure medication and thats how my life is now. It all feels so strange and over the past 8 months a different person is emerging! Physically I look totally different,not only the new silver grey hairdo but also I have got very skinny - but more than the physical appearance I notice that my priorities in life are changing and what I used to get het up about - seems less important now. What matters is being on a healing journey of self discovery arriving at a place of total acceptance of what is.
In all of this I am so truly grateful and blessed to have the support I do, my friends are amazing and just there - they call themselves the Sisters of the Extended Hearts - my room is full of flowers and perfumes and my experience is that I am not in hospital but in a comfortable hotel!
The staff at the hospital here are extraordinary and I have personal care - they ask "What do you want, "Is there anything I can get you" . I have always been so independent and indeed to let anyone contribute to me has occurred like a weakness and that I cant take care of myself. The nurses are so loving and caring - it's remarkable!
So part of this journey is being contributed to and I'm seeing that allowing people to contribute to me is a contribution to them - and I have never looked at it that way before. My view has been that I would be "obligated" and lose a sense of freedom. Where that comes from I dont know - though there is some of the British independence and stoicism there, I'm sure!
I was thinking today that it seems like my life has become about medication, doctors, turmoil, fear sadness and loss of control. Then I realised this is my mind going crackers - really I do have a life threatening illness - but my life is about love, contribution, friendship, family. There is a lot of colour and joy in my life, a lot of caring and comfort and thats really whats so. And for all of that and for all of you I am truly blessed to have you in my life!
Until next week, lots of love
Suuz xoxoxo
powersource246@hotmail.com
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