"A Final Word from the "Bloke"

It's Monday January 4th and after 2 weeks of rest and recuperation in Maine with my daughter Gretchen and her family (two grandkids Grace 9, and Lucy 6), I am back in Niwot to resume life. It seems so strange not to have Suzi in my space. We both worked from home so she was always around doing her phone calls, rearranging things in our space, fussing over who to have over for lunch the next week end etc. I have been giving away her things, sending family heirlooms home with Steve to Perth, cleaning up from the "early christmas", reaaranging the Master Bedroom and moving back in as well as loads and loads of laundry etc. I am actually doing quite well as far as I can tell.
I had been waiting for the grief to arise over the holidays and it started on New Years Eve when they broadcast the New Year arriving in Sydney. The fireworks display from the Harbor Bridge brought up a wave of sadness and emotion so I knew things were starting to "bubble". I travelled back to Niwot the next day (New Years Day) and was a little startled to enter a cold dark empty house. It erupted on Friday morning, the 2nd, upon opening a condolence Card from a friend. The card contained a poem called "Miss Me But Let Me Go" and I include it as follows:

When I come to the end of the road
And the sun has set for me,
I want no Rites in a gloom filled room
Why cry for a Soul set free?

Miss me a little - But not too long
And not with your head bowed low
Remember the love that we once shared
Then, Miss me - But Let Me Go.

For this is a Journey we all must take
And each must go alone.
Its all a part of the Master's Plan
A step on the road to Home.

When you are lonely and sick at Heart
Go to the friends we know
And bury your sorrows in serving them well
Then, Miss Me-But Let Me GO

Upon reading this the floodgates opened and I wailed for about 15 minutes. The grieving has begun. And in the process of being with the grief , I became present to the loving community who surrounded us during the last few months and particularly at the end. As Lilly and I cleaned up the Christmas Decorations on Sunday it occured to me that Suzi's legacy for all of us was to get us present to the power of Community "as a presence" and that was a sacred gift.
It opened a door for all of us, I say, and I am committed to keeping that door open. I don't know what it looks like fully yet but to get the ball rolling I am scheduling a series of "Suzi's Sustainable Community Luncheons" which will take place on the 1st Sunday of each month starting Feb 1, 2009. The Brunch will start at 11:00 am and go til people leave. The format will be potluck . The Context for the luncheons will live in the domain of "What can I do for You"/ What do you need?" .....to furter what you are up to. Prepare for rampant networking as an acknowlegement of Suzi's Legacy for us all. I'll provide the "Woine" as well as scrambled eggs and bacon/sausage. Please RSVP by email to terry@tgranger.com for the February kickoff!

Finally I want to express my deep appreciation and gratitude for the incredible support that all of you extended to us during these trying times. The "Lone Granger" was floored by the outporing of love and grace that poured into this home through the dying process. Whether it was the question, "Can I Provide anything?, cards, flowers, soup, cassseroles, cleaning help, reading to Sooz, helping with the bathroom journey, doing the laundry, loading the dishwasher, picking up the mail, helping my heroic son Web with all of the scheduling and technical matters. Thank You, Thank You, Thank You. I love you all.
Your Humble Servant
Terry
"Suzi's Bloke"